More Abraham stuff. This time we get near the end of his time.
CHAPTER 18
Now for one of the more confusing parts of the Bible, where
three angels appear before Abraham and Abraham refers to them as a singular entity,
but plural pronouns are used. According
to what I’ve heard, this can be explained with how the ancient Hebrew (and thus
the Old Testament) views angels. They
are not beings separate from God.
Instead, they are a form of God.
In his pure form, God is beyond humanity, so when he wants to visit
humans, he has to come down in a human-like form – hence angels. And being God, he doesn’t have to be in just
one. So here he’s in three.
I’m not sure if Abraham recognizes them right away or
not. He treats them very well, calls
himself “your servant,” and kills a nice calf for them, but that could just be
proper way for dealing with guests.
Then again, he calls them “Sir” right away.
Then Sarah gets a laugh.
The angels tell Abraham that she’ll soon give birth to Abraham’s
son. Can’t blame her – she’s 89 years
old. She claims to the Lord that she
didn’t laugh, but the Lord corrects her.
By this time, Abraham and Sarah know these three men are the Lord.
The second half of the chapter sets up Sodom and
Gomorrah. This is a really nice section
as Abraham tries to argue with God about them.
God says he’ll destroy the city because its wicked, and Abraham doesn’t
just accept this. He asks what if there
are 50 righteous people there? OK, then
I’ll spare them? What if it’s 45? I’ll spare them? How about 40? Or 30? Or 20?
Or 10? The Lord remains
steadfast – they’ll always be spared.
There’s a couple interesting things going on here. First, Abraham isn’t just sitting back and
taking it. He’s got a case to make, and
he’s pressing it. In doing so, he makes
the issue not just about the morality of the people of Sodom and Gomorrah, but
about the morality of God. People have
to be moral in the Bible, and Abraham is one of the first (the first?) person
to make it a two-way street. People
must act morally proper – but so must God.
Second, while pressing his case, Abraham is always very
careful to not step on the Lord’s toes.
He’s respectful and diplomatic to the point of obsequiousness. “See how I am presuming to speak to my Lord,
though I am only dust and ashes!” “Do not let my Lord be angry if I go on.”
“Since I have thus presumed to speak to my Lord” “Please, do not let my Lord be
angry if I speak up this last time.”
In “The Good Book” by Daniel Plotz (excellent and highly
recommended), he notes that a lot of the best and most memorable characters are
the ones who don’t just passively accept the Lord’s instruction but try to
haggle or play some angles. Abraham
does it. Moses does it. And some others do, too. (For Plotz, that became the main point of
the Bible – wrestle with it, and try to come to terms with it, but it’s not
just God’s terms, but yours as well).
Chapter 18 is one of the highlights of the Bible so far.
CHAPTER 19
Now for the big fireworks show. The angels come to Lot outside of Sodom and he takes them
in. He acts like Abraham did, and is
kind to guests and is hospitable. The
rest of the town is different. The
Bible is very clear – “the townsmen of Sodom, both young and old – all the
people to the last man, surrounded [Lot’s] house.” Every last damn (no pun intended) one. And they have their demand – give us the men in your house. We want to anally rape them. So here’s the first Biblical passage that
can be used to condemn homosexuality. (It can also be used to condemn
inhospitable treatment of guests, but that’s another matter).
And this leads us to an incredibly ugly moment. No, not the destruction of the town, that’s
still a bit ahead. I’m talking about
Lot’s reaction. He makes the mob of
Sodomites a counter-offer. Look, please
leave alone the two men who have come under shelter of my roof – take my
daughters instead! Yeah, he offers his
young daughters to the mob of would-be rapists. He really tries to play it up, too. They’re virgins! “Let me
bring them out to you, and you may do to them as you please.” HOLY CRAP!
He’s inviting the people of Sodom to gang rape his daughters! Given the size of the crowd, they might be
raped to death. But they insist – they
want the men!
OK, let’s pause here for a second and note a couple
things. First, why didn’t the people of
Sodom do this to Lot when he first came to town? I dunno, maybe he’s an uggo.
Or maybe it’s because he came to the area with wealth whereas these
travelers are just travelers.
Second, please note that this crime the people of Sodom are
going to commit – the crime that causes the Bible to justify their destruction
– isn’t just sodomy. This isn’t just
raping men. They hope to rape angels of
God. No one realizes that yet (even
Lot) but that’s how it is. And
remember, angels were seen as God himself on earth. So the crime they’re hoping to commit is gang raping the Lord
Almighty. (By the way, that means Lot
was willing to have his daughters raped to death simply and solely to defend
two guys he just met. Incredible).
Oh, one last point here.
Why the hell has Lot lived there for any length of time? If they really were such bad people,
shouldn’t he have noticed this before now?
Instead, he’s lived there for a while – before the birth of Ismael,
which would be about 13 years before now.
And Lot has not only stayed there, but contracted his daughters to marry
two locals.
Anyhow, God blinds the mob and tells Lot to get his family
and scram. The sons in law to be thing
he’s joking and stay. Dumb. Lot, Mrs. Lot, and daughters Lot all leave –
but the wife looks back and becomes a pillar of salt. I think that’s just done to explain the terrain around the Dead
Sea.
Side note: what the hell did Gomorrah ever do to deserve
this? The Bible has all the bad things
happen in Sodom and doesn’t really have the people of Gomorrah do
anything. I guess they’re just supposed
to be as bad.
Lot and kids eventually settle down in the hills, where we
get a nasty little coda to what’s already a nasty story. The daughters bemoan
that they are alone with no men except their dad, so they take turns getting
him drunk and sleeping with him. They
both become pregnant and their sons become the ancestor of two peoples: Moab
and Ammon.
Well, lots of ugliness here to contend with. So how do you make sense of any of it? The easiest part is the last part. The Hebrew were related to the Moab and
Ammon peoples (like the Scandinavian nations are similar to each other), but
they didn’t get along. So you do you
explain similar peoples you don’t like?
Products of incest.
The rest?
Yowzers. Well, it shows the
strength of the Lord. Was there perhaps
already a story of destroyed cities that the Bible had to contend with? That would explain the odd
along-for-the-ride destruction of Gomorrah.
Apparently, there is an Akkadian poem about cities destroyed by fire,
though it doesn’t match up too well with this one. Clearly, the Bible itself has some moral qualms about what went
on, as evidenced by Abraham’s dialogue with God in Chapter 18 and with the
insistence that all Sodom was outside Lot’s door. My hunch is that this was a story, like the Flood, that predated
the Hebrew religion that the Bible authors felt the need to contend with. So there is a clear acknowledgement that
only something really, really horrible could justify God’s wrath like this, so
here’s the story.
CHAPTER 20
After two straight
blockbuster chapters, we get a low key one.
It’s a duplicate story, actually. It’s Chapter 12 all over again, only
instead of going to Egypt, they’re going to Gerar. Again Abraham is afraid that because Sarah is so pretty that
he’ll be killed if he tells everyone he’s the husband, so he says he’s her
brother. Sarah goes to the king’s
harem, which I guess Abraham is OK with.
Same result – God tells the King careful, the king apologies. He actually gives Abraham plenty of wealth. Oh, and in the process, God calls Abraham
his prophet, the only time he actually does that.
There is one new wrinkle this time around. Now Abraham says, look, I wasn’t actually
lying. She really is my sister – we
have the same dad, just different moms.
Wait – what? When did this
happen? Nearly half of the Bible so far
has been on Abraham and this is the first we’ve heard of this. It didn’t say that back when the characters
were introduced. It didn’t mention that
in Egypt. But it mentions it now. Well, maybe it was a way for the Bible
writer to excuse Abraham of lying.
That’s my hunch.
OK – so how come Abraham didn’t do the same last time. I know the answer here. The Torah has four main sources weaved
together in one. The first story came
from one group of stories, and this from another – they are called the J and E
authors (which refer to the different words the authors use to describe God –
one calls him by name, the other just by his job title (the Lord). J is believed to be the priestly clans of
Israel during the divided kingdom days and E the Judah priests during that time. When the northern kingdom ceased to exist,
some priests came south and their stories were added together, causing some
repeats, like we see here.
Final note – Sarah is 89 or 90 years old at the time of this
story. Some parts of the Bible just
plain don’t make much sense.
CHAPTER 21
It’s a boy! Isaac is
born to 90-year-old Sarah and 100-year-old Abraham. Congrats all around.
Well, not to you, Tamar.
Sarah is upset that Tamar’s son might take some of the inheritance of
her son, so she wants Abraham to drive them out. God tells Abraham to go along, they’ll be provided for. So Abraham gives them some bread and water
and off they go. Mind you, they nearly
die, but that’s how it goes. He and Lot both have their limitations as leaders
of families. God pledges to make
Ishmael a great nation.
Then there’s some stuff about a well Abraham has rights
to.
CHAPTER 22
Time for another blockbuster. As Bob Dylan says: “God says to Abraham kill me a son / Abraham
says man you must be putting me on.” God
tells Abraham “Take your son Isaac, your only one [sorry, Ishmael!], whom you
love, and go to the land of the Moriah.
There offer him up as a burnt offering on one of the heights that I will
point out to you.” Man, God just lays
it starkly out there. No pussyfooting –
your son, whom you love. Only son
(which isn’t fully true, but no matter – Isaac is the one that’ll
inherit).
Abraham doesn’t try to disassociate himself from it all
either. He calls Isaac “My son” when
Isaac asks about the burnt offerings.
Abraham binds him, put his son on the alter, takes out “the knife to
slaughter his son.” Not just use on or
something like that – slaughter. Only
then does God cry out Abraham’s name.
Now the Lord restates the covenant, but this time goes so far
as to swear it’ll be the case: that Abraham’s descendents will form a great
nation.
It’s a powerful story, to be sure. I don’t have too much to
say about it, other than how does this impact Isaac? Apparently he takes it in stride. Maybe he heard the Lord’s voice, too, when the Lord called out to
Abraham. What was he thinking when
Abraham bound him? Did he resist at
all? Make any pleas?
There is one randomly placed coda where we learn about the
nieces and nephews of Abraham. There is
only one item of importance – we first here of Abraham’s grandniece,
Rebekah. That would make her a cousin
once removed to Isaac. So Issac, whose
parents are half-siblings, will marry a cousin once removed. Really, though, marrying cousins wasn’t that
big a deal back then.
CHAPTER 23
Sarah dies at age 127.
The rest of the chapter is just negotiations for her burial plot. This gives Abraham a claim to the land of
Canaan, which is sure worth noting given what’ll happen later on.
Side note: we've already established that she's the
half-sister of Abraham, and they have the same dad. Well, by my calculations, Sarah dies in the year 2085, just two
years after her father (and Abraham's father), Terah. He died in 2083.
Still alive, are Shelah and Eber, who are of generations 13
and 14. Abraham and Sarah are in
generation 20.
CHAPTER 24
This is by far the longest chapter so far – 67 verses. Here Abraham is taking care of some of the
final business of his life – looking to get a wife for Isaac. He is adamant that Isaac not go back to
Abraham’s old stomping grounds for a wife, but he still wants a wife from that
region. This is Isaac’s land, so he’s
not to leave it, but the people around aren’t their people, so let’s not marry
with them. Abraham is too old to leave
and he doesn’t want Isaac to go, so he has a servant go. Even though the servant is the real star of
the chapter, we never learn his name. Bummer.
Oh, and it’s an interesting oath the servant must take – he
must put his hand under Abraham’s thigh and vow to try to arrange a marriage
with one of Abraham’s relatives.
The servant comes across Rebekah at the watering hole for
livestock and she’s immediately very nice to him. They go to where she lives and her brother Laban isn’t
immediately nice – but once he sees some sign of wealth, he’s all Captain
Courteous. Heh. That sets the tone for Laban right away.
This is a long chapter because it’s repetitious, apparently
a hold over from oral tradition. Verses
34-49 are a rehash of what happened before.
Rebekah agrees to marry. Laban
wants to hold things up for a bit, but she wants to go right away. According to the footnotes, by custom a
father didn’t need a daughter’s permission to arrange her marriage, but a
brother did need that of his sister, and this is brother-sister. And they are both a cousin once removed from
Isaac, though no one minds that.
Click here as we move from Abraham to Jacob.
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